Prisoners and college students have absolutely nothing but one thing in common! We are both on a budget.

I’ve read that inmates get a set number of meal tokens — they can use them on meals or trade them with fellow prisoners for cigarettes and other items. Similarly, many college students get a set number of tokens, or moneys, from mum and dad, working, selling off body parts, etc. And at least some of those moneys have gotta go to clothes.

Now, there are ways to make a little money go a long way when building a wardrobe. Listen closely.

Being Cheap, er, Thrifty: Beginner’s Version

Never buy anything at retail. In my younger, more ignorant days, I did maybe purchase one or two pieces at retail. But those one or two articles are my most hated pieces of clothing because two weeks later they went on sale, and then I realized I had paid $60 for a sweater I could have bought for $30. Fashion goes in then out very, very quickly. Stores get in new merchandise weekly, and, when they do, guess what happens to the old stuff? It goes on sale. And then smart people buy it.

Shop on eBay. Often. I’ve had people tell me they do not shop on eBay because “isn’t everything on eBay USED?” Um no. Don’t be ignorant. Some things are used, yeah, but many many things are new and new with tags. Some things people buy and change their mind about, some things people get as gifts, some things people find for cheap and resell for profit. In any case, most everything on eBay is below retail — at least a little, if not a whole lot. And we like things below retail. See the previous paragraph.

Shop at places like Forever 21 and H&M. Both companies’ designs are relatively inexpensive and always incredibly in sync with current trends. Shortly after Paris Hilton was spotted in a $400 floral chiffon dress from Foley & Corinna, Forever 21 had a replica dress on their website for, like, $30. It sold out in a few days and thereafter could be found on eBay for upwards of $100. That doesn’t happen with every article of clothing from F21 or H&M, but the point is that you should shop there. Their stuff is cheap and cute.

Being Cheap, er, Thrifty: Advanced Version

Recycle your clothing. I don’t have anything from more than two years ago unless I still wear it on a fairly regular basis. What do I do with my old clothes, you ask? I sell them on eBay. People will buy anything on eBay. You could even sell your old socks on eBay, and foot fetish pervs would buy them. You might be perpetuating foot fetish pervertedness, but it just might be worth it. You could buy new socks with the old socks you sell. And when you wear out those socks, you can sell them on eBay and use the money to buy a new batch of new ones. You may never have to spend money on new socks again. Or shirts. Or pants. You get it.

Occasionally splurge on a few designer items. Well, erm, maybe a little more than occasionally, and a little more than a few. But whatever. I do this because you can look like you spend a bunch of money on your outfits when you really don’t. One designer piece can automatically boost your entire outfit. A $20 Forever 21 dress, for example, instantly looks better when you pair it with a Marc Jacobs purse. A vintage tee looks better with a pair of Diesel Zathan 772’s (my all-time favorite men’s Diesels. Drool). You get it.

But, alas, I can’t impart all of my secrets. Then you would all dress as well as I do. And that is so not happening.