Former Israeli Commander Yehuda Shaul emphasized the moral quandaries faced by soldiers serving in the occupied territories in a speech to students and community members in Jordan Hall last night.

“The national project in Israeli is to remain silent,” Shaul said during last night’s event, Breaking the Silence: An Evening with Former Israeli Soldiers, hosted by the Coalition for Justice in the Middle East (CJME).

Last night’s event focused on the role Israeli soldiers play in the occupation of territories in the West Bank and Gaza Strip and the moral dilemmas they face while serving.

“We know that war is an ugly thing,” Prof. Hilton Obenzinger, moderator of the discussion, said. “But we need to take a look at the occupying power and what the occupying power is supposed to be doing.”

“It is the story of my generation,” Shaul began.

As a boy, Shaul said he felt it was his duty to society to join the army. For him, it was not a burden or an unwanted obligation, but an honored responsibility. He served as a commander in the Israeli armed forces in Hebron until 2004.

“It comes time that your generation has to stand up for your country,” he said. “My father did it. My younger brother will do it.”

But he said the feelings of honor and pride faded away as he transitioned from a commander to a civilian. Like many soldiers, the moment of returning home proved to be difficult for Shaul, who called that moment “terrifying” but also “enlightening.”

“Suddenly, the reasons I gave to myself for doing the things I did did not apply anymore,” he said. “It was like waking up in the morning, standing in front of the mirror and seeing horns on your head.”

The return to civilian life forced Shaul to reevaluate his image of the Palestinians he had encountered as a soldier. In the army, Shaul explained, the dehumanization of Palestinians was the only viable way to continue fighting. Soldiers divided residents of the occupied territories into two types: the “wanted terrorists,” who were taken for interrogation, and the “detainees,” those that committed small crimes like leaving the house during curfew.

“He stops being a human, he is not there, you cannot feel him,” Shaul said of his interactions with Palestinians in the territories.

As a result, he said, “there was a need to create between yourself and your surroundings a wall of silence.”

In this moment of enlightenment, Shaul said he and 64 others decided to “break their silence” through testimonies and exhibitions of photo albums.

“For me it is very simple,” Shaul said. “I see this as a way of taking responsibility. I can’t go back in time and change the things I have done, but I can stand up and break the silence.”

He had always believed that as a soldier, one should distinguish between good and evil. But, he argued, the conflict soon consumed simplistic ideologies and beliefs.

“We are used to a life of black and white,” Shaul said, “but the story in the occupied territories is gray.”

Obenzinger echoed the former Israeli soldier’s sentiment.

“It’s not as if the Israeli army is the only one committing war crimes — there’s blood on everyone’s hands,” he said. “But because Israel is the occupying power, it has more force and more ability to do harm and should have more responsibility.”

Shaul called Israeli the “the victim of being a victimizer” and stressed the importance of taking responsibility for dehumanizing actions in the occupied territories.

“Responsibility in my eyes doesn’t end with occupiers; it is with every human being around the world,” he said.

The talk was the latest in a series of CJME-sponsored events aimed at raising campus awareness of the situation in Israel and Palestine.

The CJME is a student group committed to promoting an understanding of current events and dedicated to justice in the Middle East, said senior Olivia Sohns, co-president of the organization.

Shaul’s decision to engage in an open discussion of Israeli and Palestinian conduct during the conflict is extremely important, Obenzinger said.

“It’s very hard for soldiers to speak out — they don’t want to betray their country or the trust of their comrades,” he said. “So when they do, they have something important to add to the discussion of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.”

“When soldiers speak out,” he said, “change is possible.”