“I’d say they’re the two people in the world I’d least like to fight.”

- Comment regarding ZZ Top

“I wake up and you two are naked - no, no, you do it all the time...”

- One guy to his two roommates

“My better judgment is on vacation.”

“Are you speaking Japanese or Jewish?”

“This reminds me of The Great Gatsby when...”

- Oh, Stanford

“I kissed Dan.”

“Your gay best friend?”

“Yeah... but we had sex three years ago so it doesn’t count.”

“‘Tender is the Night’? What is this? I thought you wrestled bears!”

- Remarked while looking through an iPod music collection

“He only talks to me when my hair is curly.”

“We were so slick when we were monkeys.”

“The brownies really worked!”

“I’m not a ho. I’m not a ho. I’m... kind of a ho.”

“Tag that shi! That’s my new facebook picture.”

“To poor decisions!”

- As a toast

“Peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time...”

- A la Brian from Family Guy

“Let’s go, bitches!”

- As she takes off running

“We should get some Pizza My Heart when we get back.”

“Ahh, pesto pizza...”

“Hey, we’re facebook friends but I’ve never met you!”

“What’s my major? What a freshman thing to ask!”

- I’m a sophomore, thanks.