Ah, Thefacebook.com. Aside from the endless debate on whether the group “Perfect 10” has hotter girls than “Hottest Stanford Girls (and yes, there actually are some)” it really does provide the easiest way to do any sort of “journalistic” research. So while we all marvel at groups such as “Do Your Part” — and its archnemesis, “Do Your Part is Not Smart” — I give you the weirdest music choices from Stanford student-athletes, as self-reported on Thefacebook.com.

Donald Sage (Track and Field): “Creed, Maroon 5, basically anything middle-aged guys listen to when they wanna Rock!!” — Somewhere, God just read this sentence and killed 10 kittens.

Tony Azevedo (Water Polo): He doesn’t have a profile, but a teammate confirms that he listens to “Karma Chameleon” by Culture Club to celebrate after victories. I’d make a joke here, but it’s really not necessary.

Andrew Kartunen (Soccer): “U2, Coldplay, Millencolin, The Postal Service, Radiohead, Something Corporate, Luciano Pavarotti, Andrea Bocelli.” — Pavarotti? (Reporter raising eyebrow.) Don’t read past U2, he just listens to “Sunday, Bloody Sunday” on an eternal repeat.

Evan Moore (Football): “I believe just a good dose of This Years Love that is Accidentally in Love” I have no idea what this means, but I don’t like it.

Amanda Trotter (Cross Country — Track and Field): “Anything.”

Katy Trotter (Amanda’s twin): “Almost anything.”

Fred Washington (Basketball/Host of MTV’s “Pimp My Ride”): “Anything good.”

Phil Kim (Ex-Track and Field): “Eminem, Cam’ron, Young Buck, Rent.” Hmm, which one of these doesn’t go with the others? Phil also claims he is taking a class entitled “FEMST 1: Tip Drills” and “ATHLETIC 202: Spooning: Advanced,” so he has a wide assortment of psychological problems, I’m sure.

Steve Gerberman (Fencing): “Rap, Country, Classic Roc — a variety.” Completely false. I know for a fact that this guy listens to nothing but Kelly Clarkson.

Matt Lottich (Ex-Basketball): “Hip Hop, R&B” However, his favorite book is the Bible, so I’m just going to go ahead and assume he only listens to Creed.

Jeremy Barton (Crew): “country country country.” Lame lame lame.

Spencer Porter (Soccer): “Fiona Apple” — What a fruit.