I feel like I’m eating at an elegant wedding reception. We’re sitting in the overflow section of Straits Cafe, a high-class Singaporean restaurant near campus. Space heaters warm the canvas-partitioned patio area. Fountains, plants and sculpted Buddhas complete the greenhouse/wedding-tent feel. The red lighting makes shadow puppets out of the vine-covered trellises and paper lanterns. It feels clean and understated.

Be sure to make reservations at this popular restaurant. The menu offers a fusion of various Asian cuisines. According to Straits’ Web site, Singapore is the crossroads of Southeast Asia and its food is inspired by Indonesian, Chinese and Indian cuisines. We’re eager to try it out.

There are seven of us, but our waiter says we can only split the check four ways. Suddenly, the math becomes very complicated.

“I’m not sharing a check with you,” Rosabelle says to Ricky. “You already owe me money!”

“Hey,” Ricky replies. “As long as I owe you money, you’ll never be broke.”

Our long-suffering server waits until we stop bickering and decide on an appetizer. We go for crispy calamari with lime aioli and roti prata (grilled Indian flatbread) with curry dipping sauce. The roti is fantastic and disappears in seconds. Attention then turns to the calamari and it takes less than a minute to wipe the plate clean.

If you eat at Straits (and you should), choose a drink that adds to the experience. Mango lemonade is both glamorous and delicious. There is also an exotic yogurt drink in flavors like rose, black currant and passion fruit. In addition, Straits has an extensive list of cocktails, which I will be legally able to review in one year and five months.

Waiting to order our food, the conversation turns to the pros and cons of the phrase “comparing apples to oranges.”

“It’s very logical to compare apples and oranges,” Debz claims. “They’re both round, juicy fruits.”

“We should say, ‘That’s like comparing apples to the Empire State Building,’” Matt opines.

Comparing food at Straits Cafe to “food” at Lag dining would really be comparing apples to the Empire State Building. It takes several minutes to decide between the many appealing dishes on the menu. You can dine family style and share several dishes between your friends.

The chicken pad thai in tamarind sauce is tasty, and the spicy basil chicken is incredible. Our friend Armando proved his manhood by ordering potong kari ayam — an entire half a chicken with yellow curry and potatoes.

Matt’s lamb korma comes in a glass bowl with a pastry shell baked over the top of it. My roommate recommends the laksa paella, a spicy coconut risotto with abalone, shrimp, scallops and vegetables.

No one has room for dessert, but we order it anyway. Straits has the kind of desserts you want to paint pictures of before eating, and I can hardly bring myself to take a bite and ruin the aesthetics of my last course. I order kueh nagasari, or Singaporean banana pudding, and it comes in a cone shape wrapped in a banana leaf. The leaf looks like a sail, and my pudding is in a sea of artistically swirled strawberry and mango juice. I finally dig in and find that it tastes even better than it looks. I also recommend trying the sago pudding, which is sticky rice topped with palm sugar and coconut milk.

My roommate’s car only seats five, but we stage our own miniature circus — we pile seven people into it. Sitting on Armando’s lap with my face in Debz’s armpit, I’m thinking about the next time I’ll go to Straits. I need a sugar daddy, I decide. Or, hey, there’s always Parents’ Weekend.

The verdict:

Straits has delicious food and phenomenal desserts. It’s a bit pricey for what you get, so save it for an event when conspicuous consumption is in order. Straits would be a stellar restaurant for a hot date.